Do you have an idea but no one will buy from you? Learn how to sell with confidence so people will start buying from you. To learn more about how to get people to buy from you you might want to check out my “How To Sell Anything Handbook.” Where you can learn exactly how to get customers.
Be confident. How do you act confident? Everyone says, “just be more confident, then you can earn money.” But HOW can you be more confident? Can you just tell yourself to be more confident and it will work? No. You can be more confident though by working on you body language, how you say the things you say, and your verbal’s or “what you say”. I will explain.
First, you need to understand how we communicate with people. Sixty percent of what we say is our body language. Meaning, body language says the most about what we are trying to communicate. Next is our Para-verbal’s or how you say the things you say. They make up about 30 percent of what we communicate to others. Last comes “what we say” or the actually words we use. This makes up just 10 percent of what we communicate.
So what does this all mean for you? If you want to be more confident you need to first work on your body language. You can train your body to be and act more confident. I have done it. When I first started doing door-to-door sales. I had to master my body language so people would know that I meant business. From applying and mastering these skills below I made over $95,000 in just four months of door-to-door sales.
Start with the Basics
First you need to start with the basics. After you have mastered the basics you can go on to master the rest of the confidant skills. As a kid, if you can apply these seven points, you will be very successful and make lots of money.
Smile– Keep a smile on your face as you talk to people.
Head Nod– Nodding your head up and down gets people to agree with you.
Fidgety Hands– Don’t fidget with your hands. Leave them at your side or hold on to a clipboard or flyers.
Shifty Feet- Stand still and be a statue. The less you move about the more confident you will come off. Get your stance and keep it.
Slow Down– Slow down how fast you are talking. When you are nervous you want to talk fast, resist the urge and talk slow.
Pauses– Add pauses to emphasize important words and sentences.
Filler Words– Get rid of filler words like, um, uh, and like, like, stuff like that.
Steps to Mastering Confident Body Language
- Appearance– Looking good and clean cut will go along way in trying to be more confident. That means, shower, brush your teeth and smell good. That means a good short haircut for guys and a clean well kempt hair for girls. No facial hair is best for guys. Clothes need to be clean and have no holes. Modesty for guys and girls is also important. Guys, don’t wear wife beaters or baggy pants that look like they are going to fall off. Girls don’t wear tank tops, super short shorts, and make sure you have no cleavage showing. Having a clean appearance will take you far in life. People will trust you more and think you are more confident if you do this.
- Smile– A good genuine smile on your face will make you look very confident. When you smile at people it makes them feel like you are their friend and they will often smile back. Smiling is contagious and will make you both feel more comfortable.
- Head Nod– “Oh the mighty head nod”. This is your Jedi mind power. You really can control how people think. Head nodding is also contagious. If you head nod then whoever you are talking to will most likely head nod back. Every time they head nod with you that means they are agreeing with you. Its like they are saying “yes, yes, yes, yes” every time their head goes up and down. Have fun with this because it works.
- Eye Contact– Looking people straight in the eyes shows confidence. However, you don’t want to have a staring contest because that is awkward. Instead, look away about every 4 seconds. Make good eye contact for 4 seconds then look away. Don’t look down. You can look up like you are thinking, but the best thing is to look and point at something. You just need to make everything you look at have a purpose.
- The Power Stance– When you are talking to people you shouldn’t shuffle your feet or sway side-to-side doing a potty dance. The power stance is planting your feet and holding your body still. Put your weight on your front foot or the foot closest to whom you are talking. Be a statue. Whenever you are standing and trying to be more confident, you need to always stand at an angle. Never stand straight on or parallel with each other. Standing straight on is very confrontational. In their mind it tells them to be ready for the attack. Standing at an angle with your weight on the foot closest to them is a very non-confrontational non-aggressive stance that shows confidence.
- Slow Gestures– As you are nervously talking to someone the natural tendency is to make quick jerky hand gestures. Moving your hand and arm together slowly to point at something shows confidence. I have started talking to people who I could sense they were nervous. As I used slow gestures they calmed down.
- Mirroring– If you have ever played ‘Simon Says’ you can do this great. You copy the person as if you are looking at yourself in the mirror. If the person you are talking to folds their arms, then you fold your arms. If they sit down and sit back in their chair then so do you. If they lean in then so do you. I’m sure you get the point. Just act like you are standing in front of a mirror. When you mirror it makes people feel comfortable.
- Minimizing and Maximizing– You can do this by using bigger gestures to maximize what you are saying and shrugging your shoulders to minimize things. If you are telling someone how much you charge you would say “Its just 10 bucks an hour” and shrug your shoulders as you say the word ‘just’. That minimizes the 10 bucks and makes it seem like not a lot of money.
Body Language Don’ts
When you are nervous your body and face naturally will do things that make you look nervous so watch for them. They are:
- Don’t move your hands or twiddle your fingers
- Negative head nods or shaking your head no
- Looking down
- Jerky fast movements
- Shuffling feet or potty dance
- Itching your nose
- Touching your face, or covering your mouth
- Deer in the headlights or wrinkled forehead
Master How You Say Things- Para-Verbal’s
Para-verbals again are how you say what you say. It is the intonations of your voice, the inflection at the end, and the tone you are using as you talk. To talk confidently you must:
- Talk Slow– When you are nervous the natural tendency is to talk faster. Focus on talking almost uncomfortably slow. When you talk slow it shows confidence and you will be more relaxed and the person you are talking to will be more relaxed.
- Pitch goes down at the end of everything you say– If your pitch goes up at the end of everything you say then you will sound like you are asking a question. You will sound unsure about what you are saying. The trick is to start your sentence in a higher tone of voice and then end low. This is how you normally talk to your friends and family- you just didn’t realize it. It is when we get nervous that your pitch will start going up.
- Volume– Normal speaking volume. Most people talk loud when they are nervous. If you think of the classical salesman they talk fast and loud. Talk in a normal voice and people will think you are confident and will listen.
- Echoing– This is fun. You speak the same as whomever you are talking. If it is an old guy who is kind of deaf and he speaks really loud you speak really loud back. If it is a mom that is trying to whisper to keep her baby asleep then you whisper back. If you talk like the person you are talking to then they will like you and relate to you more. It is part of being confident.
- Minimizing and Maximizing– Adding emphasis to specific important words and pausing is how you maximize and minimize what you say. For example, if you say “I will mow your whole yard” you drag out “whole” and make it sound big. After saying “yard” you would pause. To minimize your price you would say “I will do all of that for just 20 bucks a week”. Maximize “all” and as you say “just” you shrug your shoulders. Pause after you say “week”. That is how you maximize and minimize your message.
- Silence– Silence is golden. This is part of maximizing and minimizing. After you ask a question or ask to mow someone’s yard, pause and wait for them to respond. That makes them think and make a decision. Don’t feel awkward with silence.
Master What You Say- Verbal’s
“What you say” using good body language and good para-verbal’s can get people to naturally agree with you. They’ll agree even if what you are saying doesn’t make sense. That doesn’t mean that “what you say” is not important. The important thing to remember is:
- Talk Professionally– Get rid of “yeah man”, “like” and other kid slang phrases.
- Get rid of filler words– These are um, uh, ah, stuff like that, etc. When you are nervous and can’t think of what to say then the natural tendency is to put filler words in. It sounds really bad if you use these.
- Avoid using negative words– Don’t say things like, can’t, kill, don’t know. Fill with positive words like, can, sure, or I’ll find out.
- Maximize and Minimize– Use words like “just” and “only” to maximize and minimize what you say. Look at the examples above. Only say “dollars” when you want something to sound like a lot of money. Use “bucks” when you want your price to sound small.
Whether starting a business or trying to make some quick cash for the movies, if you apply these things, you will come off super confident and will be successful at whatever you are trying to do. If you want to learn more about how to start successfully selling your product or service then check out my “How to Sell Anything Handbook.”